Memories

There comes a time, seemingly in every week, where nostalgia overtakes the mind and one settles down to watch a short of what their life has created thus far. I remember thinking about the past in more of a longing than a reflection. When my mind would settle on the times I’ve had and wish with all my might that I could go back to those times when everything seemed simpler, easier, and overall more enjoyable. Perhaps its the toils of growing up that give us this impression that life only gets harder as you get older and that the good times will tend to only be memories, fading images in your mind of the times that you once took for granted. Yet now I think back on events, people that I once knew much better than I do now, friends that I once had but now hardly acknowledge and I find myself being joyful rather than having a longing in my heart. I realize now how every moment defines who you are and every moment that you share with people defines who they are as well. I think back to the times I’ve had, the people I’ve known, the lips I’ve kissed, the hugs I’ve given, the music I’ve played, the life I’ve lived and I long no longer for what I can never regain. There is nothing like a happy memory except knowing that you will one day make another that will perhaps trump any memory since. There is nothing like hearing something about an old friend or an old fling and knowing that they’re doing alright and that some part of you is still with them just like they’re still with you. I guess it’s reassuring to know that by being present in someones nostalgic flashback that in a way you’ll live so long as they do. I remember a line that said that we die twice, once when our body dies and then again when the last person who remembers our name dies too. It makes me enjoy these memories more, knowing that I’m keeping those friends and loved ones alive, that their memories, no matter how they exited my life, are safe and secure, that they’ll never die so long as I have a breath left in my body. Life isn’t about making memories, its about experiencing the event that created those memories. So as today passes into tomorrow, I’m gratful that yesterday existed. I’m grateful that I did my best to prolong my life, tucked away in someones head, even if I just come alive once in a while, even as a whats-his-name. You make a memory you live forever.

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